A few moments of pleasure, a lifetime of regrets

 A few moments of pleasure, a lifetime of regrets.

Have you ever heard or have seen that line? I don't remember where I have seen it but it stuck to me.  It was my mantra while I was going thru college.


I remember, when I was in college, the bus I was taking to school would pass by this small village occupied by low income families,  houses with tattered roof, toddlers running about with snotty noses and holes on their almost see-through sandos. Haggard looking mothers screaming at the top of their lungs and cursing left and right for their offspring to go inside the house begging them to help with chores. The scattered fresh laundry waving in the air filling the whole street looking like fiesta banners. It was a depressing sight and one that makes me paranoid and cringe. I was perpetually scared to end up in a place like that.

You see, I did not come from a well-to-do family. Sure, I graduated from a private Catholic school, but that's because my father got lucky to land a job that pays good money for a blue collar job. He was working for a rich pharmaceutical laboratory. Unfortunately, he was laid off by the time I finished high school because of some company merging. He was offered hefty "buy-off", a force retirement money and we could have lived very comfortably through my college years. Unfortunately, my father had been a victim of the Ponzi scheme and he lost half of his money (he was planning to use that money to renovate our house). Thankfully, we survived that predicament, and I was still able to graduate.


It wasn't just the money that helped me go through college though, it was “my mantra”. I was so scared that I would fall inlove, lose control, throw caution to the wind, end up getting pregnant and land in that "village" as a bonus. 

I.was.very.paranoid. 

It's a good thing though. It kept me in line. Everytime I meet a guy that I like I remind myself of “the village”. I had an "almost boyfriend" early in my college years but I never really had a real one until I was in my 3rd year (I was a late bloomer). I don't see him too much though (I was a "sideline" I later found out), so I guess that somehow helped too. 

Where am I going with this?

Recently, a family member is going through some health issues, serious health issues, and it's because of "throwing caution to the wind". A few moments of pleasure, with some bad friends (not all his friends are bad though), and lack of self-control, and voila, he's now in a very bad condition. A condition that can never be reversed. He might not be able to walk anymore in a year or two.


"A few moment's of pleasure a lifetime of regrets"


It amuses me how each one of us are wired differently. You would think common sense is, well, common, but apparently it’s not. Some would always err on the side of caution; while some gamble with fate, even if the most common of all common sense are sending alarm bells.

Some would say I am paranoid, but I disagree. I am just cautious. I'm being responsible. I try to choose the path of less regret  ("try" as the operative word, because let's face it, we all have our weaknesses). Thankfully, I have the foresight to know what the consequences of any misdemeanor. It's not rocket science, really, it's just, well, common sense. Sometimes, listening to older people’s advises, or observing other people’s mistakes very much help too.

Unfortunately, this is not the case for some. You will be surprised how some people just don't have that “cause-and-effect” concept wired in their brain. They live in the moment. They only care about the now. They like the thrill of it.

Or maybe they just like doing mind games and like being stubborn to spite a nagging sister. What’s the gain in that though? Who will suffer in the end? 

I remember my father's friend. He was an alcoholic. I remember my mom reprimanding my dad for hanging out with this friend because every time they are together my father will always come home drunk. One day, I was just in elementary that time, that friend of my father had a stroke. You probably know what that means, half your body is dead. That friend of my father has been cursing alcohol ever since. He regrets how he took his health for granted and because of that he can never go back to his old self. 

Every afternoon I would see him walking by our street (he was exercising)with his right arm folded permanently infront of his chest (think butler carrying a towel by his arm), with the right hand flopping and lifeless while he takes slow steps and dragging his right leg while walking. I really feel bad for him.

"A few moments of pleasure, a lifetime of regrets".

How many times have we seen or watch movies or even know someone who are teenage mothers? Didn't finish high school and at 22 has 6 kids, living in that "village", with an alcoholic for a husband. Gone are the days where she thinks her husband was the cutest thing. She's despising now how she let him touch her. "But it was wonderful", she would say. She was never touched like that before. Unfortunately, that touch lead to having twins. She had to drop out of school because she's embarrassed and it just went downhill after that.

"A few moments of pleasure, a lifetime of regrets".

Now that I have kids of my own, I am hoping to instill to them the importance of making good choices. I don't know if having a foresight for consequences are genetic or instilled but I sure want them to learn to practice common sense…or the basic concept of   “cause and effect”…  and the meaning of...

"A few moments of pleasure, a lifetime of regrets".


....and I really hope I would atleast succeed on that regards...